Dear me, it has been a day. I awoke this morning (New Year's Day) to find huge banners hanging all around the Isle of Lost Nuns reading "HOORAY, HOORAY! IT'S CANNIBAL DAY!" Needless to say, I was alarmed at the prospect of eating another human, until I read a nearby poster nailed to a palm tree. It read:
Cannibal Day Dishes
Caprice, Garhuckle Leonard Ulrick Sherlock Torrence Ignatius
Houston, Sister Whitney Elizabeth
Of couse, I was alarmed, not least because they spelt 'Ulric' with a 'ck' and immediately hid myself in a cave. I planned to craft a makeshift gondola to escape upon.
When I entered the cave, however, I found a trapdoor. I entered and found myself in a dirty passage, clearly dug by an inexperienced tunnel-digger. There was a sign on the wall reading "Welcome, near-eaten sister, venture forth toward escape or stay ye put for garlic-scented doom". Naturally I was more inclined towards escape than said garlic-scented doom, and so I crafted a makeshift habit of palm leaves to disguise myself as a Lost Nun.
I followed the passage for (I assume) many days. Eventually the passage began to ascend, and ultimately ended in another trapdoor. I pushed it open, and the sight that met my eyes made me speechless; I was staring at Paula's livingh room from beneath a rug. I exited the passage, and replaced the rug that had been concealing it.
What now, I do not know. I am disconcerted by the suddenly apparent shadowy mysteries of Paula's past.
With an interesting, yet unpleasent emotion,